AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Randomize