WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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