I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
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