Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Randomize
