Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
She even gives head with a lisp.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Randomize
