Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
