We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Randomize
