hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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