I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
