I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
We need to rekindle our bromance
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
You may now shotgun with the bride
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
