She went from zero to smokin in five shots
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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