GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
