I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
