Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
