I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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