You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
she looked like the before picture.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
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