just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
