I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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