I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
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