I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Randomize
