ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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