"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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