you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Randomize
