Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
