Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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