on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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