We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
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