she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
