They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize