I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
