If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize