i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
