This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
