So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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