I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize