is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
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