I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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