He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
