By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Randomize
