Well apparently he's into motor boating.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
