I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
