That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
