You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
