it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize