So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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