Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
even my farts smell like vagina
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
