Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
