Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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