She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Randomize
