she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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