we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize